Day 15: Drawing
Today was essentially recovery and cleanup from last night’s party. It was a time where I found it necessary to sit and watch a movie and take care of Noah who had been drinking and having fun until 6 that morning and woke up at 10am (still drunk). He was feeling pretty sick, so instead of going to some New Age events I decided it was a fateful opportunity to take care of the dogs, read more Eckhart Tolle (Awakening Your Life’s Purpose), and take care of Noah.
I hadn’t really made much progress with the book and I felt my journey into Awareness was a path I could not halt, that a progression of events would continue without me whether or not I had read enough to understand them. Reading the book proved to help me with some feelings I had been trying to fight since the party. I was feeling bitterness at some people because of many reasons, some ranging from feeling personally attacked to simply being disappointed by how they’ve changed.
After everyone left I finally could rant to Noah about what I didn’t like at the party. I soon realized that I could only see the bad, but overall the party was a huge success. It was then that I realized my journey to Awareness may continue without me, and I was becoming stagnant; leaving a pile of disappointments and grievances instead of a trail of past negativities left behind. The fact that Noah was feeling very sick and exhausted and thus didn’t have the energy to hear it made me realize it was a problem I needed to learn to cope with alone that day.
Anyway, I sat down to read the book and it began to talk about egoic aspects very relevant to my current feelings. Here’s a list of quotes I read in succession today that related to my current situation:
- “Ego implies unawareness. Awareness and ego cannot coexist. …every time it is recognized it is weakened.”
- “Complaining then turns into reactivity, another of the ego’s ways of strengthening itself.”
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“To carry a grievance is to be in a permanent state of ‘against’.”
- “It requires honesty to see whether you still harbor a grievance”
- “Don’t try to let go of the grievance… Forgiveness happens naturally…”
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“When you complain, by implication you are right and the person or situation you complain about is wrong”
- “There is nothing that strengthens the ego more than being right”
- “Being right places you in a position of imagined superiority…”
- “There is nothing that strengthens the ego more than being right”
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“Ego takes everything personally.”
- “Ego confuses opinions and viewpoints with facts”
- “Every ego is a master of selective perception and distorted interpretation”
- “Only through awareness can you see the totality of the situation and person instead of adopting one limited perspective”
All of this New Age stuff is really getting to me! I prefer feeling that events in my life were set in front of me for a purpose. I am beginning to feel self conscious about it though. It’s embarrassing to tell everyone I believe all this stuff, but it’s the right way to go, and I’m really glad for it. I was talking to Noah about this book and he said “So this is like the Bible to you now huh?” I paused and he reassured me there was nothing wrong with that but I didn’t like the idea of relying on a book to sculpt how I think I should be.
My Jesus?
It’s strange but when I first opened this book I was incredibly skeptical and didn’t think it would have much impact on me. The part that really made me keep my distance was that it said this book can’t just be “interesting”, that you had to believe in it to achieve Awakening. That made me leery of its concepts; it made me think this was some kind of scam that fooled people who didn’t feel any “awakening” into thinking it was their own fault.
I had accepted this book as simply “interesting”, but it didn’t seem to accept that about me, and soon what I was reading was somehow becoming reality in almost every way. It feels as if I’m trying to walk on the wrong path because it’s easier to travel but I’m being forcefully guided on the right one, and that something is making the wrong way less easy and more treacherous.
Perhaps this journey is easy because I’m being eased into committing myself to it and once I have committed to it I will be faced with more difficult events. This reminds me of a Roald Dahl story I read a while back called “The Wonderful story of Henry Sugar” (link to a better summary of the story) where a rich immoral man pursues a spiritual practice for selfish reasons and it ends up transforming him into a good person. It’s a great short story, I suggest you check out the book!
Anyway, besides Eckhart Tolle I also did a really cool drawing exercise meant to be done on one’s birthday. It was suggested to me by my English teacher who is helping me with this blog. It is supposed to tell you how your life in the following year will be like. Here’s the link to the directions, I HIGHLY suggest you do the exercise BEFORE looking at my drawing! It should only take a few minutes.
My results:
Snake: In the emotional quadrant. Emotionally I will/need to heal through expressing my vision and communicating my ideas. The tongue is in the physical quadrant which means I need to communicate to the outer world more (I need to put myself out there, presumably for the blog) I also need more beauty in my life…so maybe I need to appreciate nature more?
Flower: In the physical quadrant, so I’m most willing to be open to new things physically.
Bird: In the spiritual quadrant which is where I need to use communication. Interestingly, the beak is in the mental quadrant.
Path: In the emotional quadrant which means my goals are emotional (my goal is for happiness which is an emotion). It also leads to the Mountain but specifically does not lead to the shelter. So perhaps my emotional goals are geared towards spirituality.
Mountain: In the emotional quadrant, means I have a deep emotional connection with the sacred as in love and nature.
Butterfly: In the mental quadrant which means there is something I’m going to outgrow mentally. A symbol of transformation.
Tree: In the emotional quadrant. I’m going to go through natural emotional growth. The roots don’t show so I only want to share roots/origins with people I trust. I think it’s not that I don’t like sharing my roots with everyone but I don’t like to use my origins as a way to define who I am today.
Shelter: In the emotional quadrant, it means a strong emotional sense of self. I feel strong emotionally.
Overall: I think it’s really interesting that most of the symbols lay in the emotional quadrant as I never considered myself an emotional person and actually quite the contrary. I always assumed that it meant I was emotionally numb, that deep inside I’m a weak person but I’m so fragile I hide that part of myself but according to this it’s because I’m emotionally strong but I could do with emotional growth. I also found it strange that the beak of the bird and the tongue of the snake were in different quadrants than their bodies. It seems that communication is an important theme in my life right now which makes sense because I’m an inherently non-verbal person. The idea that I’m to outgrow something mentally takes me back to reading Eckhart Tolle and how I need to get out of my thoughts and mind and how the process has already begun.
Today wasn’t incredibly eventful, but a learning experience nonetheless.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 2 so far )Days 14: Expectations
This morning I went to the New Age bookstore that I’ve been frequenting lately. I was supposed to join another “Circle of Joy” session at 11am but I got there too early and had an hour to kill before it began. I looked through the store and began reading an astrology book. An old man perhaps in his 50’s or 60’s approached me and asked if I was reading with my mind or my soul. I told him I didn’t know and then he told me I was very old. I assumed he meant my soul was old and took it as a compliment. I asked him how old he was and said he was only 126 and said he was really young. He told me I should see him and gave me his card; he was a “Counselor-educator” and had a PhD!
It was a very strange experience; he didn’t seem peaceful like a monk, in fact on the contrary he seemed pretty abrasive and pushy. He gave me a brochure to see “Amma” a woman who was going to be in the area soon. I asked if it was free and he said I must have a little Jew in me! I feel as if this encounter was fateful in a way: I will be coming to the Amma event and maybe even contact this man if he doesn’t charge too much money (and no I’m not Jewish at all just poor).
I found somewhat of a bargain at the store. Packets of energy crystals for only $5 each! They were small so they fit perfectly in my medicine bag. I bought two: one for transformation (I thought I could do with something that would help me transform) and one for peace (It felt like I needed that the most). There were others; some for success, spirituality, love etc. On my way to take pictures of them I must have misplaced the Prehnite. But I’m going to assume that was meant to be.
My favorite is the labradorite. When I first took time to look at it I thought there must be a blue light somewhere reflecting off the stone, but then I realized it was inside the stone. A beautiful, rich blue that didn’t seem natural to originate from anywhere…it felt deeply spiritual. The ocean Jasper is amazing too, I suggest you google it and see how many forms it takes!
Later at the circle of Joy session I was a little disappointed; the same concept from the previous circle was repeated in essentially the same manner by the host and I felt like there wasn’t enough time to really understand what was going on. There was this repeated concept of drawing “energy” from above or from God. It was a good concept and I was taking it to heart but it just seemed that the session was meant to be a place where people could share their experiences, a place that was supportive of others’ problems and successes. The problem was there wasn’t enough time for that. I was excited to share my spiritual experiences but I didn’t have the opportunity. I do like the idea of it, but the structure was a little confusing to me.
Guess what? I saw 2 hawks today! I was driving home and they were flying low and close together. One veered off and disappeared but the other flew along the road. I was pretty much driving (slowly) with it until a car drove up behind me. It was an amazing experience!
Today my parents left for the weekend and let me throw a party at their house. I’m not really the type of person to have a lot of friends but I know plenty of people I get along with well. The problem is that none of my friends really know each other at all. When it comes to setting up a party we were worried that no one would enjoy themselves because they wouldn’t like each other. Usually when Noah and I considered having a get-together it was a stressful time. We would compile lists of who would get along with whom and which group of people would be most fun.
This time Noah and I decided to invite whoever I liked instead of being worried if they would end up liking each other. It ended up being a good plan and the party ended up to be a success. There were some extroverts and some introverts and I think the balance of the two ensured that things didn’t get too rowdy but it was still a good time. I was expecting to find out who my “true” friends were at this event and had expectations of how things would be.
While I considered the party a success, my expectations and reliance on form (vices, people, things etc) to make me happy were not met. I feel as if I’ve begun a journey I cannot reverse or even pause and if I don’t press on I will be stuck being disappointed with everything. It seemed I’m being gently guided through this journey and when I veer off the path I’m met with disappointments. I’m a little scared that if I don’t continue reading Eckhart Tolle and pursue whatever fateful opportunities come in my path I will lose everything that I expect to make me happy and won’t have learned how to be happy without it.
It was enlightening to see all the people I like together in one night. So many different personalities! I realized a lot about who I value and who values me. There were some friends I considered great and hoped for them to be permanent but tonight I saw them in a completely different light. It seems that some of them were so much younger before and they only grew in a certain direction. I’ve been reading about how people try to define themselves by what they want and have and I felt like many people there were gradually refining their self definitions into a very specific niche.
This saddened me, and made me wonder if I have somehow become like that without knowing. It’s hard for me to understand why someone would, in my perception, limit who they are by only allowing themselves to be a certain way. It brought me back to this experiment in general and my own spiritual journey for this month. I have always wondered what it was like to truly belong to one “category” or “type” of people, and that’s essentially why I started this. I also have never valued that common aspect of humanity, and in reading Eckhart Tolle realized I wasn’t alone in this philosophy.
I feel like discovering one’s self requires for this to happen. I mean, I’m sure these people are just realizing what they want/like/have and finding comfort in knowing that. So am I the one in the wrong? I’m always searching for what I really want, but what I want is happiness, and what I envision as happiness changes. Does that mean these old friends have a vision of happiness that simply stays the same? Or are their goals and wants not for happiness but for other words they equate to happiness like respect from others, success, riches etc?
I was pretty reluctant to actually have people over this weekend because it didn’t feel completely conducive to being New Age but I’m really glad I did and feel it was a fateful learning experience. Lately, everything feels like some kind of learning experience. This point of view makes life feel much more….useful than before. Even negative experiences have something to offer to me!
There was a bonfire at the party and we told everyone to bring brats. I was initially really excited because I LOOOVE Johnsonville beer brats but then I realized I’m vegan and can’t eat those. I got some Field Roast smoked apple veggie brats with sage in them and realized how amazing fake meat can be at tasting really good! It’s got a good consistency and kind of tastes like really mild tasting meat with lots of seasoning to make it taste stronger. I think they do really well making fake meat taste good.
AND it’s got sage!!
I also made homemade French fries! I’ve made them before and they have consistently been a big hit so I tried again, and again they were a hit. Some people even said they were the best French fries they’d ever eaten! I love making good food. The recipe really isn’t hard at all though, so its not some big feat that I accomplished.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 5 so far )Day 13: White
I wasn’t really feeling the flowy New Age clothes since it was cold out so I opted for the next best thing: color therapy. At least in Ayurvedic medical practices it’s good to wear light colors in order to feel happier. I had a white jacket I never wore because I spilt turmeric on it and there was still a yellow stain on my arm but I decided why not and took it out for the day.
I was excited to feel happy but I think brown was the intended color for me to wear that day. On the way to school from my house I realized I forgot to grab my stir fry which would be the food for the day so I called mom who was at home to drop it off at a good middle ground. The middle ground was a local coffeehouse. I got myself a coffee there and realized it was incredibly bland so I opened the lid to add some sugar. I didn’t close the lid well enough though because as soon as I took a drink I looked down and there was a giant spill of coffee all down my white jacket and it was only 10am! As I began to remove my jacket I realized I had decided to wear a brown tank top (I was worrying it would be white and got stained as well) I guess brown was just my color today.
Looking into color psychology more, I realized that white isn’t really a good color to wear anyway. Mostly I think it’s a crappy color because I have to try to not touch anything but it also is known to be uninviting and somewhat hostile. Brown on the other hand creates a sense of strength and reliability, two virtues I have been especially craving for schoolwork and my blog. On the down side it can make me feel sad and isolated, but on the contrary today I felt surrounded by friends and pretty happy. I’m going to go shopping for some vibrant colors from now on to see if colors help me. Green sounds like a good color for me: it’s supposed to make you much more relaxed and helps you read! I think I could do with some yellow clothes though, as they make you happy and optimistic. Still, yellow is my least favorite color, I might just feel ugly the whole day.
I’ve been especially lethargic today and I don’t know how or why. It’s becoming increasingly harder to get out of bed, which is kind of depressing. My motivation is steadily rising, but my concentration and peacefulness have gone down a lot. I feel though as if I’m being guided towards awakening/enlightenment: during my break from New Age I began to indulge in activities and food that I couldn’t really indulge in the past. The activities that traditionally brought me great happiness (eg internet surfing and TV) seemed to bring me something more akin to frustration. I looove Ling Ling pot stickers and made some the night before I renewed my experiment. Ling Ling pot stickers were one of my mood lifters before this; they are so expensive (compared to their much cheaper competitor) but so tasty they became the coveted meal for home meals.
I feel like once I become aware of my ego, the less it maintains its grasp on my soul and doesn’t allow for me to fall back on dysfunctional thinking. There are things I’m learning from the Eckhart Tolle book I’m currently reading, and one of them is that we rely on “form” (e.g. objects, activities, tangible things) to make us happy, to define us. I never considered myself in that light but I do have my vices like pot stickers and candy. I rely on some things to make me happy at times, so it was really interesting to finally be able to indulge in what I thought would make me happy, and not become happy from it even though it wasn’t something I had overindulged in.
Noah and I were too late to do Dhammakaya meditation because we wanted to go out to Indian food with Riley, a friend. We decided to just go to our office which had couches and peaceful lighting and do it there. We meditated Riley’s style, which was much more laid back than Dhammakaya style. It was a little less successful than my last time meditating, which could probably be attributed to the fact I hadn’t meditated for a while. I eventually fell asleep (the second time that day I passed out) but I am beginning to recognize how vital meditation is to my well-being. While it can be somewhat stressful to not do well at it I found that I was finally really at peace in my body and I needed more.
I’m going to try to do it whenever I have spare time. I think I’m going to try it before bed every night. In fact, I tried it tonight! I was having trouble getting to sleep (probably because of all the little naps during the day) and tried to meditate in bed to quiet my mind. I don’t know how well it worked because I passed out pretty quickly after but I think this will prove to be a great sleeping aide.
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Day 9: Church
This morning I went to a Unitarian Church. My mom goes and I’ve been there before. I felt it was uncomfortably churchy… but it’s a church so what was I expecting?? But honestly, it was a little weird for my tastes. There were sermons, a choir, and singing and such a strong sense of community that it made me uncomfortable.
I have to admit that it seems like a great place where people can feel like they’re part of a community that takes them in with open arms. There was quite a variety of people and they were all very nice. During one of the sermons (is that the correct terminology for this?) many people in the room were brought to tears, it was a very powerful experience, and I realized that in this kind of environment no one would judge you if you cried. I plan to keep coming, and overcome my fear of being open with complete strangers.
There’s just this cheese factor that throws me off I guess, I feel like such a jerk though. I mean they are genuinely nice people, why should I feel uncomfortable? I really want to learn more about it and see if it makes me feel more spiritual. Hopefully I can push past that feeling of suspicion; if I can then I imagine my new self to be more secure in my own skin around strangers. That would be a great feeling!
The church program
Later that day I celebrated Mother’s day with my wonderful mother, who has been supporting me with this project and encouraging me to continue (mom, you are the best!). We had Indian food (again!) and I realized a lot of the awesomeness of Indian food has to do with the fact they ingeniously put yoghurt in their dishes. Unfortunately for me I couldn’t allow for any type of dairy in my diet, and while it was still delicious, that previous wonder I had for awesome Indian food had somewhat faded.
Well, I’ve always truly loved Asian food anyway, which is also more vegan-friendly as they rarely use milk or cheese.
We stopped at the expensive New Age shop again, this time mom was with me and we exchanged gifts. There are so many awesome things here; it’s just so unfortunate to see how expensive they are. Mom got me a cool New Age bag to replace my ugly leather purse and some ayurvedic soap that was strangely only $1.50.
The bag is amazingly light compared to my old purse; I’ll probably use it after this experiment. I have yet to use the soap; I’ll probably use it for Day 10. I don’t think I’ll like the soap, though it smells like India, I just have serious doubts because it was so incredibly cheap compared to every other product at the store. You know they were selling Nag Champa powder for $8?? It’s supposed to be burned and helps you become spiritually awakened. It was interesting because this little tiny baggie of loose powder compared to a box of Nag Champa incense that was sold for only $5 seemed so much less efficient.
Oh and guess what I saw today while in the car with mom? An eagle soaring above us; that’s the third hawk sighting!
During the teepee yesterday, someone mentioned what he called the “Simion” book (Later I found out it was called “Keys to Soul Evolution” and “Simion” are a collective of light beings here to guide humans). He said he asked a question to it and opened it and he would receive cryptic but relevant responses. I found out that I had this book at my house and decided to try it out. I asked “Will my blog be successful?” and the reply was about the great and infinite potential humans have. So this means I have a lot of potential? I was pretty disappointed with that revelation, and felt that it said a whole lot of nothing.
Maybe I’m just doing it wrong? I found out from my mom it wasn’t a tradition stated within the book itself, it was one that was formed elsewhere independently.
I also finally got around to reading Eckhart Tolle (“A new Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose”). His stuff is incredible! I am very skeptical of abstract concepts, and his book began with the concept that flowers, birds, crystals, and precious stones held a lot of significance because contemplating them would open one into the realm of the spirit. It seemed a little much to me, a little…”wtf” I guess would be the best way I could explain how I felt about it at first.
But soon enough the concepts began to come together to a fundamental idea of “awakening”. Here I realized that Eckhart Tolle had really done his research. He cited many religions and their similar concepts of “awakening”, from “salvation” to “enlightenment”. He said we were suffering from “dysfunction” which was the cause of all the destruction we caused upon ourselves and the planet. If we did not become awakened soon, then it would be our failure to adapt and we would all die.
This really struck a chord with me. The concept made perfect sense. Still, a lot of it seemed to be more from psychology than spirituality, and that whole new idea made me wonder if this “awakening” could be done without seeking spiritual guidance.
Could someone seek to better themselves strategically in such a way that made them eternally happy? A lot of spirituality seems closely related to psychology, so why wouldn’t it be possible for a psychologically minded person to find eternal happiness, or maybe something different but akin to the same concept of awakening. Perhaps I’m confusing awakening with supreme wisdom, I don’t know if I truly understand the concept yet, so I should just ponder it after I’ve read it more.
The way Eckhart Tolle speaks of his teachings makes me wonder if Texe Marrs (author of “Dark Secrets of the New Age”) was on to something when they said the New Age movement is trying to dominate the world. Of course, I don’t think the intentions are malicious, and Marrs acts as if that were something terrible and unheard of (despite Christian attempts to convert any and every country they can).
What if there will be a movement, a divide not between Christians and New Agers, but Atheists and New Agers. What if society begins to devalue spirituality and value only what has been proven through studies and experiments? What if society begins to value the benefits of multiple spiritualities, recognizing that no one religion is meant to be the only right way.
It always seemed to me that culture has leaned toward Atheism and further away from religion. But now that I’ve done this experiment, I see spiritually minded people absolutely everywhere! Spirituality never seemed necessary to me before this, but I can see at some points it’s vital to explore one’s spirituality. It’s a journey that takes a lot of balls to be honest. To sit there and read something you know sounds ridiculous, to wear clothes you know make you feel good but are seen by others are tasteless, to practice exercises that put you in very unflattering or silly positions.
It takes some guts to be that open to new things, and I honestly must applaud New Age men for being so much stronger than the typical man. You are so ignored in this genre, so much so that when I was at the New Age store with my mom there was a bookshelf that was divided in halves: Women and Men. The men’s side was on the left, and there were 8 books that filled this section (the rest of the bookshelf was filled with books about women)! A man exploring his spirituality should be revered more than a woman in my opinion.
Whenever a man does something that has the potential to emasculate him in front of his “manlier” peers and he doesn’t care, that to me is true confidence. When a woman does it, it of course is respected, but it doesn’t put them in a position as it does for men. What’s interesting is how traditional that dynamic is; women are more emotionally in tune and thus wouldn’t be judged if they chose a spiritual path to self betterment while men are expected to be skeptical and objective.
Not to say that I honestly expect these things of either. I myself am more like a man at heart while Noah seems to have a much easier time becoming spiritually in tune. The dynamics still exist though, despite many of us knowing that they aren’t needed.
Anyway, later that night since it was Sunday I realized I needed food to tide me over for school on Monday. I decided to make my favorite dish: stir fry!! Not to toot my own horn, but honestly, I make phenomenal stir fry. Just look at it! I’m going to jump on the foodie blog bandwagon for a second:
Corrina’s Delicious Stir Fry Recipe
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Experiment #2: New Age
New Age and Me
I chose New Age because my mom could relate to many of the practices, meaning I wouldn’t have to spend too much money on it and since I am a poor college student, that worked out nicely for me.
Personally though, I find New Age to be somewhat annoying. I feel as if it’s a place where people choose to believe whatever they want to believe, while I choose to be more grounded in reality. Still, I admit that I do have many spiritual beliefs, and I honestly feel that spirituality and science will eventually combine. I think there are aspects of spirituality that have truth. I just believe that studies will eventually prove them.
I have a scientific mind, but it’s still open to new and exciting things.
I respect their practices for self-betterment though and have always tried to improve my own personality but not through spirituality.
Doing more research on this has made me respect the subculture much more because it seems that
many of these people are laid back and open minded; two virtues I value. Also, I strongly believe in the “placebo effect” to help with a lot of problems today and though I may not believe that some holistic medical practices work I do value their use on people who believe in them.
I’m looking forward to opening my mind and forgetting about how “cheesy” things are. The more I immerse myself into this culture, the more excited I am for how it will change me for the better. This will be much easier than Girly Girl, which required a relentless and painful routine based completely on my outer appearance.
What’s Going to Happen?
I think I will embrace the free flowing, laid back attitude of New Age and not try for structure. I will schedule events to attend and regular practices like meditation but I will not plan my outfits ahead of time and I will not force when and where I am going to adopt a certain belief. I expect to meet a lot of different people through the course of this experiment and in doing so I will be lead into different practices as they come to me.
Here’s what I’ll be doing for sure:
- Never “talking shit” about people: show understanding and tolerance of others
- Become a vegan
- Eat healthy!!
- Avoid technology whenever possible (only computer for work and school, NO TV OR GAMING)
- in my spare time read Eckhart Tolle and other books related to spirituality
- Regularly do yoga and meditate
- frequent places that New Age people go to (instead of spending all my time at school, leave as soon as I can)
- Surround myself with people who identify as New Age or practice a branch of spirituality that applies to the culture
- Always maintain an open mind
- Try to have sustainable practices
- Dress in “New Age” clothes (loose, flowy, colorful, or earthy)
There are a few things I want to try once or twice over the course of this month:
- Astral travel
- Hold a Séance
- Do tarot card reading
- Crystal Healing
- Homeopathy (if I ever feel sick)
- Acupuncture
This list will probably be modified once I surround myself with New Age people.
It’s Official: New Age!
Ok guys, I know it’s been a big wait, and I’m sorry! I had to take a break for finals and since I’m getting credits for this quarter I waited for the quarter to start. Don’t worry, I’ll be creating a list of “makeover’s” for the months to come so the inner struggle won’t be so lengthy.
Anyway, I wanted to do something with minimal costs or interferences with my relationship with my boyfriend. I realized that since my mom knows a lot about the New Age movement I wouldn’t have to do too much time consuming research and also the costs would be minimal.
I will be updating on my planning process and don’t have a date for when it starts yet; it should be relatively soon!
I want to make this incredibly organized so bear with me while I attempt to be that (maybe I should try to be organized for a month…).
Also, if you don’t know what exactly New Age is or didn’t know it was a personality/lifestyle then I suggest you click this nice little wiki link to find out.
I’ll be posting more soon, and thanks for still caring about my blog after the long wait!
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Monthly Makeovers 