Posted on January 23, 2010. Filed under: Girly Girl, Week 1 | Tags: beautiful, celebrity, clean, clothing, colors, corrina mandibar, experiment, fashion, fun, girly girl, gross, hair, interesting, internet, makeup, me, messy, neat, people, pretty, social, strange, style |
Today I woke up at 2:30!! I had taken a laxative the night before because…well, why do you think? It caused incredible pain throughout the night and kept waking me up. So that’s my excuse, and no one will question an excuse that involves public humiliation.
My days are speeding up again. Today I had to do my homework, meet with Noah’s aunt Lola, an ex girly girl who knows how to work it, and hang out with an old friend. I also had to finish yesterday’s blog.
Getting ready today was an extra pain. The night before I bought some really interesting looking eyeshadows
The ad promised they would look like this:
I was like “hell yeah!” I know that before I was raving about how not using prepackaged eyeshadow was fun but this stuff promised awesome eyes that looked ridiculously girly. So today was the day I got to try it out.
Now let me say that I’m actually well known by friends to be an expert realist artist. I can draw pictures to look amazingly realistic. Not to toot my own horn, but I can! OK OK, I’ll show you!
My drawing of a photo of a cat.
Now what I’m getting at with all this is that I wasn’t concerned with making this look amazing, even though it seemed to be a very difficult feat to pull this off. Maybe I just suck at applying makeup, but I DID NOT pull this off!
This was my first experience with a huge rip off. But at least it looked good enough for me to feel like a girly girl.
Of course what only made it worse was when Lola came over to help me be girly she kindly pointed out that girly girls do not wear that much blue eyeshadow, and they if anything, spend hours working on looking natural.
I got a lot of good advice today from Lola along with some fancy stuff.
Yes, that is a real Burberry bag
I learned a lot about how to style hair though I could never describe it in words…mostly because I can’t remember it anymore. All I know is that it’s really hard to do and just as hard to pull off. Noah will probably do the rolling for me because I will just mess it up though by the end of this month I have to know how to do it!
I realized all the stuff I was doing before was child’s play compared to what real girly girls subject themselves to. But hot damn, the end result definitely had its rewards!
If only it were just a little easier to look this good every day…
The day was short overall. I’m going to give my toenails a French manicure soon enough. I don’t want to get too hasty and say tomorrow because tomorrow I’ll be really busy. But soon enough.
I hung out with a girlfriend. We got some longer leggings at Target and I bought some hand wipes for my bag. I just need to remind myself to use them when necessary. Having girl talk was great! I miss being able to have heart to hearts with a fellow female.
Not that there’s anything wrong with my boyfriend, it’s just that there’s a different dynamic. We are more philosophical in our conversations. It’s not really fitting to talk about relationships with the person who you’re in a relationship with. It’s not really appropriate to talk about guys when he doesn’t have any other experience with dating men.
I really need to hang out with other girls more. Being around guys makes it nearly impossible to act feminine, and its showing. It’s just hard to push myself onto other women who I wasn’t friends with before. I don’t want to seem like a stalker…
I think it’s just a gradual process. I can’t jump into having a tight circle of gal pals until I’ve actually developed closer relationships. That’s one of the positive things I hope to get out of this; some good friendships. I’ve always sucked at making and keeping friends.
Not to say that there’s anything wrong with me, I just go through phases where I’ll be really extroverted and have a bunch of friends and then get super introverted and not call them for a few months.
When people keep calling and texting me for too long I get annoyed. It’s really about maintaining friendships that I suck at. I think it’s a bad thing to be like that, because I do value people who I’ve known for a long time. But at the other end I think that’s kind of what makes me me. If I kept the exact same friends from elementary school, I wouldn’t learn what I’ve learned from the diverse array of people I’ve befriended in my past.
I think the friends you make in a way reflects what kind of person you are. So what kind of person am I if I can’t maintain friendships? And what kind of person am I if all my friends are completely different people?
Posted on January 22, 2010. Filed under: Girly Girl, Week 1 | Tags: beautiful, celebrity, clean, clothing, colors, corrina mandibar, experiment, fashion, fun, girly girl, gross, hair, interesting, internet, makeup, me, messy, neat, people, pretty, social, strange, style |
Today I woke up at 10:30. It was a great morning! I forgot that I still had quiet days. Noah and I went straight to breakfast, and I didn’t change into anything until 6. Well, I guess that just because today was the all dreaded cleaning day. And I wasn’t about to clean the room and the bathroom in heels.
What slept on makeup looks like
No, this morning wasn’t really a “quiet” day. In fact immediately after making breakfast, I decided the best punishment for not finishing last night’s routine was to watch the “Fashion Police”. Now, I think I have a pretty good fashion sense because since this project I’ve been getting compliments on my clothes from complete strangers and friends alike. But I know absolutely nothing compared to Joan Rivers and Giuliana Rancic.
Sandra Bullock knows we’re watching…
This day was essentially a shitload of cleaning. I thought I would get really flustered and start crying but once I got into the hang of things it worked out really nicely!
Cleaning reminded me of playing house when I was a little girl. When I was very very young, about 3-5, I refused to wear pants and always wore dresses. This was mostly attributed to the fact that I would always see children in preschool who wore jeans come up to the teachers and ask if they could have help zipping up their pants. I would not have such a battle with dignity.
As soon as I realized that zipping up my pants was simple and easy I banished the dresses and it stayed that way. Not to say I wasn’t ever girly again. I tried my hand at playing with barbies and being a princess. And it was all fun and good. I especially loved Pegasus but my stepsisters insisted my favorite animal was the unicorn (well, I honestly loved the unicorn Pegasus!).
Playing house was always fun though; I got to pretend I was a grown up, that I could actually have my own things and make my own choices. Of course playing house mostly consisted of pretending to clean and talking on a wispy high pitched voice to sound like a beautiful housewife.
I think to some extent we all maintain that fantasy of being grown up one day and be able to make our own decisions and have our own things. It’s just looked at a different way for everyone. Some people fantasize about having that nice shiny car, and others dream of having the kind of love they would only see in cartoons.
Though, I think that when it comes to cleaning its about having that fairy tale home, being Cinderella or Paris Hilton or whatever kind of princess that gets what she wants in the end. Perhaps these girls are creating a world around them, a fairy tale world where everything is bright and beautiful and is there for her.
Or is it because taking so much care into one’s appearance naturally means taking care of one’s home? Perhaps I’m searching for a deeper meaning than I can get out of this.
The cleaning overall wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be, but maintaining it will be the true challenge. When I come home from work/school I drop my backpack and laptop on the floor and kick my shoes off any which way. When I change clothes I throw the dirty ones to the ground and if I decide I don’t want to wear a certain shirt I take off the hanger…it’s ending up on the ground too.
If I take food or drinks up to my room they’ll be there until I no longer have counter space to put more drinks, and if I buy something new, the packaging will be scattered about until I have lost it and need to search the floor for it.
These habits have got to change, and change now! My boyfriend has complete nagging rights as of today, and he can correct my messy behavior whenever he notices something.
Now, when I come home, I will neatly place my backpack and laptop in a designated area against the wall, where, if I need it, I will not tear into its contents and end up with books, cords, papers strewn across the floor.
Now when I get dressed all dirty clothes go into the dirty clothes pile before I do anything else, and all clothes I tried on but decided against wearing will go back to their designated areas. Jewelry will always go back into its’ box and makeup will always go back into its’ bag.
When I apply makeup, I will take extra care into not getting it on anything but my face. And if I get any on any surface I will immediately wipe it off.
Every weekend I will clean everything all over again to make sure it stays immaculate. I also need to get some pretty curtains for the window, a nicer office chair, and some more hangers for all my clothes.
Being clean seemed like my biggest challenge but right now it just seems like a roadblock if anything. I’ll have to get used to taking much longer to go to the bathroom, which means going to the bathroom at the right times. But maybe all this planning things ahead will work well for me.
After I was done, Noah and I decided to go out to eat. When we found out our restaurant of choice was packed we thought the best thing we could do was rent a chick flick and eat at home.
“Confessions of a Shopaholic” was a really bad movie. I think they were aiming for a “Legally Blonde” for 2009 but they just ended up with a big fat pile of shit. Noah and I got it because we thought we’d learn some things about fashion but all we learned is that green doesn’t go with yellow and I doubt that too.
The protagonist had a terrible sense of style and I’m definitely becoming more girly because it bothered me throughout the film.
After I took a shower I decided to play the game of “Which leg is moisturized” with you all! So? right or left?
I’m having harder and harder times figuring out how to put outfits together. This week I need to go shopping with a friend or I’m screwed! Tomorrow I’ll be talking to an ex-girly girl though and she might have some stuff for me.
Posted on January 21, 2010. Filed under: Girly Girl, Week 1 | Tags: beautiful, celebrity, clean, clothing, colors, corrina mandibar, experiment, fashion, fun, girly girl, gross, hair, interesting, internet, makeup, me, messy, neat, people, pretty, social, strange, style |
Today was a Friday. All I had to do was attend a meeting and run a few errands. This was amazing; I actually left school at 3:30!! Usually I hope to leave before 5, but end up leaving around 7 or 8.
The previous two days I had been applying eyeshadow easily because every eyeshadow packet has made the matching of the colors very simple:
Days 3 and 4
I was kinda breezing through the makeup application process but now I had to be a little creative. I decided to do some liquid eyeliner and have a lot of eyeliner at the bottom of my eyes. This would warrant a dramatic look, which would go with the dark colors I was wearing that day.
Then I would apply dark gray eyeshadow to the lid, and then a lighter orangeish brown above it. I know this seems like nothing much but it was the first time i really made a change with my makeup besides just different prepackaged colors.
This is definitely one of the fun aspects of being girly. It’s exciting to see how I can paint my face to make it look great with my outfit, but not over the top of course!
When Noah and I arrived at school, I felt two self contradictory feelings: craving attention from everyone and fearing leers and stares from men. I remember seeing this behavior in other girly girls.
They would walk on the street looking gorgeous and if someone honked or hooted at them they would be incredibly offended or upset. I think I wanted people to notice how much effort I put into my appearance. I wanted them to recognize that I looked great but at the same time it was an insult to only have been looked at as a sex object. It kinda feels like a slap in the face if I were to ask a guy if I looked good and he looked me up and down and said “you look hot.” It’s not hard to look hot, but beautiful and gorgeous are traits that are much harder to achieve.
Before, when I didn’t worry about my appearance, it was a compliment to be considered both hot and beautiful, because my goal wasn’t to be either. Sure every girl likes to look pretty, but I felt beautiful in the eyes of my boyfriend, and that was enough for me.
Doing myself up every day makes me feel incredibly self absorbed. I put so much time and effort to look the way I do, and so during the day I feel like I need to make sure nothing is going wrong. Is my makeup wearing off? is my necklace off kilter? Do I need to reapply my lip gloss? It’s interesting that I fear being seen as a sex object while I objectify myself with all the concern for my physical appearance!
After we left school Noah called his aunt who does manicures in an upscale salon. She offered to take us to a cheap place that sells nice hair products. I learned a lot about being high maintenance. I got 3 products: a shampoo, hair treatment, and a heat protecting spray.
The shampoo helps me moisturize my hair since all the styling dries it out.
The hair treatment does the same. After I shampoo I put a small amount (dime sized drop she told me) of this in and leave it for a few minutes before rinsing out.
When I begin to straighten/curl my hair, I spray this on and it protects my hair from the damaging heat.
Fashion tips I learned today:
- Washing my hair everyday is BAD! I’ll still be showering every day, but not washing my hair everyday
- You can slap on toenail polish and if you moisturize your feet a lot, then you can just rub off the extras in the morning!
- There are “in” and “out” nail colors for the seasons! Real high maintenance girls will do their research and get their nails done accordingly.
I also learned that I need have on me hand wipes and hand sanitizer at all times. Noah’s aunt will stop by in a few days and give me the low down on everything I need to do. I felt so uninformed after talking to her for just a few minutes!
When we finished with that we stopped at the grocery store to get some of my favorite goat gouda cheese. I’m lactose intolerant but can have goat and sheep milk products. The cheese I was looking for couldn’t be found. After we left the store I was incredibly sad.
I feel like a spoiled child. If I want something and can’t get it I feel like the world has conspired against me. Maybe it was just that this cheese was going to make my day and all I wanted was that cheese, to curl up in bed, and watch some trashy TV.
Maybe being girly is fostering a sense of entitlement, but why would I feel so entitled? Because I put more effort into my appearance than everyone else, and people who don’t put as much effort into it don’t deserve what I deserve? I don’t know, maybe I’m just looking too deep into it.
Noah ended up dropping me off at home and drove to another grocery store to find this elusive cheese. Maybe this is why I’m acting spoiled: cause I get what I want!
Me, contentedly eating my cheese and watching videos of cute animals
Before when I wanted something like that and didn’t get it I would suck it up and move on because I wasn’t about to expect anyone to solve my problems for me.
Now, it’s more acceptable for me to be high maintenance, because after all, how am I expected to go searching the town for cheese in those shoes?!
Soon after that picture was taken(around 8 pm) my boyfriend came in the room and we cuddled and passed out. I woke up at 3 in the morning, initially feeling incredibly guilty I didn’t follow up with my routine but after Noah convinced me it had been a really hard week, and I was desperately in need of sleep and relaxation I resigned to the fact that this one day wasn’t the end of everything.
After that talk he took a picture of us in the dark with flash and we had a fun time trying to keep our eyes open while being visually assaulted
This is a kind of pain that is worth it!
In conclusion, sorry I don’t have an outfit planned for tomorrow, but it is the weekend now. I hope you enjoyed this anyway!
Posted on January 21, 2010. Filed under: Girly Girl, Week 1 | Tags: beautiful, celebrity, clean, clothing, colors, corrina mandibar, experiment, fashion, fun, girly girl, gross, hair, interesting, internet, makeup, me, messy, neat, people, pretty, social, strange, style |
Today I woke up at 8:41 am. Since Noah and I were up late we didn’t wake up to the alarm.
The night before, I was also expecting my period to start. I thought to myself; “Ahhhhh! 2:30 and I’m finally putting my head on the pillow. Oh crap I need to have a pad or tampon for protection in case I start my period…. but I NEVER start my period in the morning, it’s always at night or in the late noon. But Corrina, you know how these things are – Shut up, there is a very low probability that this will be a problem! I’m just going to bed!”
I don’t need to explain what was smugly staining the sheets when I woke up. You know those Tampax commercials where mother nature is a really passive aggressive oblivious old woman (in case you don’t know here’s one of the commercials)? My version of mother nature is this fat jealous old hag who very aggressively and cleverly finds ways to ruin your day and publicly humiliate you.
My period was more pissed off than I was today because I swear it conjured up supernatural powers to completely ruin my morning.
Along with her making my alarm super quiet so we didn’t wake up in the morning, she also made sure to hit me where it hurts: I had chosen an outfit today that actually matched my favorite jacket. This red jacket is cute and amazingly comfy! I was greatly looking forward to feeling the comfort of warmth and softness on my skin. All I had to do was wash it and my outfit would be complete! When I took it out of the dryer it was COVERED in these:
Also called “pills”
Along with this I was coming to the realization that wearing the same shoes as yesterday was something of a death wish. Though this time I had socks to protect my ankles my feet were still being driven into the toe areas of my shoes at every step.
How can I describe this? Every step feels like a hammer is slamming into the balls of my feet while simultaneously tiny needles are driving deeper and deeper into my toes. This feeling gets more intense with each and every step, until I am literally driven to tears. My feet still feel sore from today, and tomorrow i have a whole new pair of heels!
I went to the mall with a friend in my cute but torturous ankle boots. I’ve learned my lesson since then, and I’ll be bringing more comfy shoes with me everywhere I go
I went shopping today for this outfit. I’m starting to shop smarter so as to save money, but the outfits aren’t nearly as awesome and are now going into realms I never knew of. For instance, that purple shirt/sweater thing. I have NO IDEA what the hell that is! I’ve never seen anything like it! I also saw something called a vest but what I would call a Sneed: a skanky Thneed. And no it didn’t look anything like a vest.
Since I bought open toed heels, I decided this would be the time to get nail polish. Purple would be a good color to match the dark brown of the shoes. The clerk said there was a buy 1 get 1 half off sale and that if I had an undercoat of white the color would look more vibrant.
When I was finished shopping I finally had time to reflect on the unbelievable pain I was experiencing. I was deep in the mall, and the long trek through it was daunting. When I finally made it to the car, I looked through my purse to find my phone so I could call my boyfriend. I’m terrible at knowing where I am so I needed directions on how to pick him up.
I looked through it everywhere but I could not find my phone. I was not going to go back in that mall though, so I decided to just try to figure it out and use my spare phone in case I actually left it at the mall. I was incredibly stressed and upset and while I was on the highway my phone rang. This made me burst into tears. Mother Nature once again ruined my night: she tore a hole in my purse pocket and my phone was deep inside my purse!
My emotional strength seems to have crumbled lately. This is most likely because I’ve been balancing school, work, and this blog while being on my period and dealing with my fear of people judging me while at the same time putting myself out there and telling people about the experiment. But I think it also has to do with the fact that my behavior is changing as well.
Being helpless and vulnerable feels more acceptable. Before I felt like I needed to “man up” because life is hard and unfair. Lately though, I feel like those emotional walls are breaking down. I wouldn’t go as far as to say that I’ve gotten nearly to the level emotionally as a girly girl, and I might be a lot more composed when my period ends and things calm down a bit but I’m expecting some behavioral changes to stick from these experiences.
When I got home I cracked open the nail polish and tried my best to make it look pretty
I said I tried my best
I haven’t painted my toenails in probably 7 or 8 years, which is a long ass time for a 20 year old! I remember when I did try that I always messed it up. I thought this was attributed to the fact that waiting for nails to dry takes a long time when you’re so young, but apparently it’s just that I’m really really bad at this.
Maybe I need to suck it up and pay the $35 for a pedicure
When I finally got to take off my earrings, my ears were even worse than before. They were more red and the holes now have this crusty stuff near the edges.
I did some interviews today, I asked people these questions:
- What’s your definition of a girly girl?
- What do you think of girly girls?
- Do you find them attractive?
- Would you be or are you friends with any girly girls?
- When you see a girl dressed up in a lot of makeup and accessories, what do you think?
- What do you like about girly girls?
- What do you dislike about them?
- Would you say the stereotypes are true?
- Would you or are you dating a girly girl?
- Would you marry a girly girl?
- Would you consider yourself a girly girl?
I’ve been getting some truly fascinating answer from people. It’s really interesting to see how a generally agreed upon stereotype can have such a variety of definitions and perceptions. I want to interview as many people as I can. I won’t have the videos up until I find someone who knows how to edit them and is willing to do so without pay (though it would look good on their resumes!). I want to compile them all and make something of a montage.
So far though, most men don’t really like girly girls. This is a relief to me, because before I was always annoyed that the most fake and shallow girls also seemed to be the most desired by men despite the fact that so many guys complain about controlling or high maintenance girlfriends.
It’s understandable that men gravitate towards the most attractive women, but what’s not understandable is the fact that so many men cannot differentiate between beautiful women and women who spend hours on their appearance.
I have to give those ladies props though because they are capable of amazing illusions!
Sorry for posting so late, I want to be more consistent, but I don’t think that’s a possibility with my schedule.
Posted on January 20, 2010. Filed under: Girly Girl, Week 1 | Tags: beautiful, celebrity, clean, clothing, colors, corrina mandibar, experiment, fashion, fun, girly girl, gross, hair, interesting, internet, makeup, me, messy, neat, people, pretty, social, strange, style |
I woke up at 7:10 today but since I decided to take showers at night instead of the morning I had enough time for breakfast.
I was excited to wear better shoes today, I expected them to if not feel comfortable at least feel better. Also, the fashion bug is kicking in, I couldn’t help but brag about how I got those shoes for only $20!
I’m beginning to have more fun with this, it’s exciting to add so much variety to my life! I’m always excited to try out new eyeshadow colors, though I think this is mostly attributed to the fact that I was trying them for the first time.
I was thinking that the balls of my feet were going to hurt instead of the sides from the high heels, but it was actually the upper outside part of my feet and most of all my ankles. My shoes were constantly chafing on my ankles which caused some little red marks, if only I got longer leggings!
The leggings I wore were just above the shoe!
After taking off my shoes for the day, I literally felt my feet slowly expand from the hours of being constricted. I felt like a victim of foot binding finally having her wrappings removed. And yes, the shoes are my size.
Today was really harsh on my ears as well. I wore some hoop earrings I got from a friend, and they were heavy! I kept complaining about them and I think people were getting real tired of my bitching and moaning about every sore and ache. I began to question the validity of my complaints until I came home that day and saw this:
It may not seem like much to you but yesterday my ears DID NOT look like this! The holes were so small that only the most observant could see if my ears were pierced. Now they’re gaping red holes. I feel like some kind of skank, so loose and so many rods inserted in there that earrings will fall out easily if I only just lean over…which is exactly what happened to me later than night when I tried on my even heavier apple earrings and leaned over to pick up a hat!
The star earrings I wore for day 2
The hoop earrings I wore today
The apple earrings I’ll wear tomorrow
I have to admit, I enjoy planning the outfits in advance, its fun to see what I can do with what I have. Its kind of like a puzzle. Of all the things I thought I might enjoy about this, this was one I thought I would hate.
Overall, my experience today was less psychological and more physical. I’ve begun to feel the symptoms of the girly syndrome. This has taken a toll on my skin as well.
I admit, I haven’t been high maintenance enough and only relied on toilet paper, Q-tips, and eye makeup remover to remove makeup.
This has resulted in my eyelids feeling raw and torn. I need to get cotton balls! On another note, I’m going to collect all the articles used to remove makeup and take a picture of all of them together at the end…that is if they don’t rot or mold.
This project is beginning to gain a lot of interest. I’m one part excited and one part scared, because with interest comes judgment. I know what I’m doing isn’t wrong, but it’s still hard to take judgments and disrespect from people. I know thats just part of this experiment, and since so few are unhappy about it compared to the many that are ecstatic, its hard to care too much about the offended.
Speaking of the offended, I decided to get some pictures of me shaving in the shower. Shaving every day is taking a toll on my legs. When I first shaved, they were phenomenally smooth but now they seem to be stubbly feeling just the next day.
Shaving is a trap! Having hairy legs is so much better than having stubble, but having smooth hairless legs is a million times better than having hairy legs. Once you shave, it just seems wrong to allow it to grow back when the in between part (the part in between stubble and fuzzy legs) seems so far away and so undesirable.
Also, frequent shaving has caused me to itch everywhere, even places I haven’t shaved. But especially my inner thighs.
I think showering so much is taking a toll on my skin, irritating it and causing itching. Today, I had a strange red spot on my chest
It’s not noticeable here, the picture was just for reference but it was right in the middle area. It wasn’t swollen it was just really red, and it itched a lot! I need to get some good cover up!
Luckily, my boyfriend understands how essential moisturization is for me particularly. He bought me a $50 tub of l’occitane body lotion which truly salvages my legs from dryness and makes the stubbliness more forgivable
I’m beginning to get incredibly self conscious of flaws; today I was walking around with my hand over my chest, being so made up makes it more acceptable for people to judge when I have, for instance, a giant zit in the middle of my face.
Being girly is a lot like eating comfort food (e.g. candy, burgers): Its really nice to just completely indulge in all of my fantasies of being pretty and being a source of envy from girls and stared at by men, I can indulge in objects and indulge in shallow celebrity gossip. But at the end of the day I feel like shit because it was all so bad for me! The pain I have to suffer, how much less of a person I am treated like, it’s just not worth the effort. At least not all day, every day.
I’m really sad about how some guys treat me now. Some people cannot stop checking me out! A lot of girls are actually guilty of this too. I am beginning to feel more and more like an object and less and less like a human, an equal. Other girly girls treat me really well though. I can’t tell if it’s just my willingness now to get to know them or if it’s that they see me and think I’m one of them. But their respect and kindness towards me is a breath of fresh air, and I am beginning to greatly look forward to seeing them more often on campus.
I’m a bit scared about how to set up times to hang out. I don’t know how to initiate friendships, especially friendships so quickly. I’m learning a lot about how to make connections with people quicker and more fluidly, and I have to respect that aspect about girly girls.
Things I need to buy:
- Cotton balls
- Cover up
- More Lip gloss
- Better leggings
I’m sure there’s more, dammit, I need to organize this better!
I’ve been getting a little better with the cleanliness, thanks to the nagging of my boyfriend. He reminded me today when we got home to not just throw my clothes on the floor but hang them up immediately after removing them. This is a concept I haven’t heard of until now, but it really works! This weekend will be a grand cleaning day, and I expect tears and a breakdown will be involved: I hate cleaning! I can fold clothes, clean toilets, and take out the garbage but figuring out how to make room for this wall and where to put that thing is utterly deplorable.
Just a reminder of the room before all this
I actually prefer things strewn about the room because at least then I can see them! But Noah (my boyfriend) will thankfully help.
I did some interviews today. I asked people what they thought of girly girls, if they thought they were attractive, and other questions. I’ll get the video up later; I need to find someone who likes to do video editing because I do not have the time for that!
The stress of school and work is putting quite a strain on this experiment, and I think there will be days where I just can’t update my blog. It’s so unfortunate because I really feel like this experience is much more valuable for learning and for even my career than the classes I’m taking now. But GPA’s are more important than blogs when it comes to careers.
Posted on January 19, 2010. Filed under: Girly Girl, Week 1 | Tags: beautiful, celebrity, clean, clothing, colors, corrina mandibar, experiment, fashion, fun, girly girl, gross, hair, interesting, internet, makeup, me, messy, neat, people, pretty, social, strange, style |
Today I woke up at 7:09 and cuddled with my boyfriend for another 10 minutes. I had to leave at 8:15…but I learned my lesson soon! In 100 minutes, I had to shower, blow dry my hair, straighten my hair, do my makeup, reassemble my purse, and eat breakfast.
I missed breakfast, but luckily I had a protein drink stored in the backseat of the car.
I have to say, it’s nice looking so good! But there definitely is a huge downside: I get stares AND glares! Typically stares from the opposite sex and other girly girls and glares from the women who are obviously the jealous types.
I got around to going shopping, and this time it wasn’t so bad! I think I’m warming up to it! I went with my boyfriend and a girl friend as well, so she was a great help. It was nice to have someone who knew what to do! But I think I’m starting to catch on
Fashion tips I learned:
- It’s bad to match your makeup with your outfit (I was aiming for the contrary before this!)
- Purple goes great with brown eyes
- Beauty is pain (I’ve heard of this, but today I learned it!)
And I went from no jewelry to this:
And now, along with my Bare Minerals I have a nice variety of colorful eyeshadows and lipgloss!
I’m sure there is a concern of the cost. This has been costly so far, but luckily I have some great people who are incredibly generous that want to help me in any way they can. I have so far gotten some clothing, jewelry, and makeup from some awesome people. And to anyone who is willing to help/ has helped, I just want to let you know that your support truly keeps me devoted to this experiment! Without the support I’ve received, I would have given up! After all, I am a college student with a low paying part time job; there was no way I could pay for a month’s worth of girly clothing and accessories!
What’s so interesting about this is that it really shows the true nature of some people. They are judging me and they have no idea who I am as a person! Prejudice against the femininity adept may not be a prominent issue but it goes to show that we as people are full of prejudices against each other.
Overall, my friends were pleasantly surprised by my transformation. They thought I looked great, but I didn’t change my behavior enough for my liking. I realized that I’m getting a little scared of becoming girly, of not being as fun to be around to my friends, and at times I think I overcompensate. Did I do this before I started the project? I have been uncharacteristically vulgar, and I think its because I don’t like associating myself with girly girls because I’m treated differently, people I like being around tend to be more guarded around me.
I realized tonight that I need to fully embrace what will happen to me, or else I will be half assing this whole project, and prancing around in heels and cute clothes doesn’t make me a girly girl. But what will it do to my friendships? to my relationship with my boyfriend? And what will I be when this ends?
I expected that I would learn to love this after the first week or two, and that after the third and fourth I would come to loathe it all over again. But what if I don’t? Well, my backup is to be a man for the month after this (despite my boyfriend’s objections).
I’ve noticed despite my denials I have developed some warning sign behaviors of a high maintenance girlfriend. My boyfriend went to a friend’s house to pick up some makeup for me while I studied for a quiz the next day. I randomly got an impulse to call and check in on him, in the middle of the call I said “By the way, I’m not being controlling,” because I was so shocked by my actions!
Later that night I was hanging up and folding clothes when I noticed a shirt he had was covered in little dog hairs. Normally, I would have shrugged and figured that when he put it on later he would wipe the hairs off but this time I thought to myself “there is no way he’s getting away with saying that’s a clean shirt” all the while I was hanging it up, completely stifling my irrationalities.
This may be attributed to the fact I’m PMSing though, so I shouldn’t be too quick to say its my 2 days of being girly. Either way it’s something I hope to never make a habit of!
It’s really interesting to see the difference even my friends begin to treat me. I feel much more objectified, like I’m some sort of eye candy. I thought I would like that, but at the end of the day I feel kind of empty and sad. Even my boyfriend at times can’t concentrate on our conversations! I feel myself being put into a label, being placed in a certain section of people’s minds, like they see me now and think “Oh, its that kind of girl,” for good or bad, its happening.
The reason I called this day “Judgement Day” is I realized that socially this was more than just becoming friends and generally associating myself with girly girls. I’m actually cutting myself off from certain types of people! Some people cannot accept me like this, they see me and how I dress and instantly write me off. I met a woman today and told her about my experiment and I could see in her face she was disgusted with what I was doing; not because she was offended by my idea, but because her first impression was of me like this and she could not take me seriously, even knowing that I wasn’t always so done up.
I’m excited to see what transpires in the future. I expect there to be some really great times, but equally bad times as well. This may change me forever, or it may just open my eyes to some new things. But the best I can hope for is that people read this and learn through my struggles and gains.Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )
Posted on January 18, 2010. Filed under: Girly Girl, Week 1 | Tags: beautiful, celebrity, clean, clothing, colors, corrina mandibar, experiment, fashion, fun, girly girl, gross, hair, interesting, internet, makeup, me, messy, neat, people, pretty, social, strange, style |
Day 1 was one of the most trying days in all honesty. My shopping trip with some girlfriends was postponed until this day and I woke up at noon. This is a late start for me, especially my first day.
I made sure to take pictures and video of me applying makeup and styling my hair but in between styling my hair and doing my makeup I had issues transferring video from the camcorder to the computer. Some of the videos were deleted but fortunately the camera I had on me also was capable of shooting video.
I still have to figure out how to edit these videos so you won’t be seeing them in a while
Anyway, I tried calling my friend and she never answered or called back. At 3pm I gave up and decided the most useful thing I could do for the day was get a manicure.
I’ve never had acrylic nails before, it was pretty frightening, they look very nice though. I do feel uncomfortable typing or really using my fingers in general but beauty is pain!
Then my boyfriend and I decided we could at least try buying one girly outfit. It was so so stressful! Trying on clothes is something I need to learn to love but right now I loathe with a passion! (As you can see by the depressed looks on my face)
Completely unrelated, but having pictures of strangers smiling at you while you undress is not something that people hope for when shopping and trying out clothing.
Tomorrow I hope things will go better, but I will be wearing a skirt all day so I expect I will be just as unhappy. And shit, I just remembered I need a matching jacket/sweater for that number!! I do not live in California, I live in a cold, windy, and rainy region. 😦
On another note, it cost around $150!!! for today’s stuff!! I’m going to have to find some very generous girls to donate their out of season clothing because there is no way I can keep this up!