Week 4

Day 30: The Last Day!!

Posted on February 16, 2010. Filed under: Girly Girl, Week 4 | Tags: |

Today I woke up at 6:30. I planned on giving this last day my all, but my raging hormones seemed to hold that back (PMS is a bitch).

Come hither…?

I felt kinda down the whole day, and when I got home at 5:30 I took a nap until 8. I wanted to end this last day with a bang, but my biggest bang I got was spilling nail polish remover all over my laptop (hence the delayed post).

Removing my nails was a huge bitch; the toilet paper I was using kept rubbing into flakes and whenever I tried to tip some remover into the tissue I would miss and spill everywhere. Plus, I finally got so see just how bad of a job that manicurist had done on my nails.

My nails were misshapen and had unsightly grooves and craters. Not only that, but the nail polish didn’t like coming off of these said grooves making my nails have red grooves and craters. I was very tempted to get acrylics all over again!

At least no one can see how bad they really look!

It was strange to know that I didn’t have to plan an outfit for the next day, I was happy, but not as happy as I would have liked to feel about it. Just brushing my teeth and sleeping was amazing though! I didn’t worry about my hair or makeup tonight!

Speaking of makeup, I compiled all of the makeup I wiped off over the month (well at least most of it):

Can you tell which days I wiped off my eye makeup? I opened a bottle of eye makeup remover I’d had on me for maybe a year on day 1 of my experiment and look at it now!

30 days of eyes rubbed raw

I’m really excited to be able to wear my warm red jacket, some comfy pants and shirt, and my good ol’ Walmart shoes!




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Day 29: snacks

Posted on February 15, 2010. Filed under: Girly Girl, Week 4 | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

Today I woke up at 11:40. I drank some wine and had cheese(goat cheese!) with Noah for Valentines the night before and I was not ready to get up so early.

When I drink even a few glasses I have huge problems with eating the next morning. I also don’t notice this problem until after I’ve eaten then all of a sudden I want to vomit. This morning I ate pot stickers and had a grande iced caramel macchiatto with an extra shot.

This was a really bad idea! While heading over to my house to do some homework we ended up parked on the side of the road with my head out the door vomiting!

When I got home I passed out on the floor for a few hours.

I watched “Becoming Jane” tonight. Nothing much to say, it didn’t turn out to be the chick flick I was expecting. I think Jane Austen just writes the ideal chick flick that appeals to today’s woman.

Tomorrow is my last day, and I plan to give it my absolute all. It’s a school day unfortunately, so I can’t do anything special

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Day 28: Valentine’s Day

Posted on February 14, 2010. Filed under: Girly Girl, Other Girly Posts, Week 4 | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

Today I’m going to take a break from my usual girl blogs and dedicate this entry to my dearly beloved Noah.

On January 5th 2008, Noah kissed me for the first time. I was excited but scared, thinking I shouldn’t get into a relationship right after coming out of one. I was sure that it wouldn’t last, that I was making a huge mistake and I would lose him as a friend. But whenever we were together everything felt so right!

On January 8th, 2008, Noah told me he loved me for the very first time. I had been thinking it, but I was too scared and insecure.

February 14th we decided to finally make it official. I was so certain it would end, but it just got better and more amazing every day.

Just holding his hand feels like sliding into a warm bubble bath. We never ever get enough of each other. Even after spending every day together we feel like we haven’t had time to appreciate each other fully if there’s been a busy day.

Noah appreciates me for who I am, he embraces my flaws, loves them in fact. For instance, my overbite that I used to try to cover up, he thinks it’s cute! I wish there was some way to convey to him how much he means to me besides fluffed up sentences and small examples.

The thing that makes me know that he’s the one is that he loves my personality and intelligence far more than my looks. In fact, my body and face mean little to him at all. He tells me almost every day something he loves about me.

Even when I make a fool out of myself, he makes it seem better!

I didn’t have enough money to buy him something special, but this morning he opened the door with his arms piled with all of my favorite treats: potstickers, goat cheese, crackers, chocolates(milk free because I’m lactose intolerant) and a bouquet of roses!

He knows who I am and what I like and can always tell if I’m upset. I had a tendency to not talk about things that bothered me because I always assumed I was wrong, but his intuition brought my problems forward whether I felt like talking about them or not. I was forced to be completely honest with him and myself and it feels so amazing to know that honesty is so welcome!

Noah is a great man, his love, his kindness, his deep consideration, and his assertiveness have pushed me to become a person who believes in herself to go forward with her ideas and without him I would have never done this experiment!

My ideas and inspirations are welcomed and encouraged, he makes me feel like a smart person, a creative person, a good person. Without him I imagine that I would be going to college, jumping through the hoops, going through the motions, with no aim or passion.

Our intimacy and trust knows no bounds, and I will never have such a connection with any other.

Noah, I love you so much! Adocleo, and Happy Valentine’s Day!

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Day 26 and 27: Chick Flicks

Posted on February 13, 2010. Filed under: Girly Girl, Week 4 | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

Day 26

Today I woke at 10 am. I had a meeting at school and nothing girly happened until I got home.

Yes, the picture is reused

When I went over to my house to visit I ended up watching “Pride and Prejudice” and “A Cinderella Story” on the Lifetime Channel.

Pride and Prejudice was a good movie. My boyfriend had never seen/read the story, he initially pouted and said that he hated “Victorian era” films. After a while, he gradually put down his DS and was absorbed. Noah ended up loving the film, the idea that a poorer woman was judging a rich man surprised him since he was expecting a cheap flick. I then realized the world of Jane Austen was invisible to many men.

Even me, someone who has never read a Jane Austen book knows of her incredible power over modern women (or at least Hollywood seems to think so). I’ve felt barraged by Jane Austen’s film adaptations since 2005, seriously, click the link; since 2002 Jane Austen films and shows have been churned out nonstop!

Just a few of these films

I want to know why exactly this is such a hot topic now when it was really a pressing moral issue at the time these novels were published. From my uninformed assumptions; the women in these books are smart and require more than just a knight in shining armor.

There were also incredible social pressures for women to marry a rich man but never seem too desperate. These cultural expectations still ring true in our culture today, but why do we need so much reinforcement?

I’m definitely going to do some more research on this, but my personal biased and uninformed opinion about just why Jane Austen would appeal to today’s culture filled with independent, smart, and classy women is that in this post-feminist era, is that it’s more OK for women to become housewives and marry into money which has made the media retaliate to show that independent and smart women are still something to be desired.

The other film also reinforced this principle although it was heavily cheapened.”A Cinderella Story“(see plot summary in hyperlink) also starred an intelligent and demure girl who ends up getting her “knight in shining armor” (AKA the football captain and hunky popular guy).

I sadly related somewhat to the film except for the happy ending part of course. I also had oppressive twin stepsisters and was the outcast in school. I even spent most of my socialization in my teen years talking to people on the internet!

When Noah and I got to his house later that night we watched an episode of Sex and the City. In the episode I noticed a very subtle detail. When the girls were out to lunch in one scene, Carrie and Samantha were sharing their meal! I also remembered an episode of Friends I’d seen where Joey hated sharing food with anyone.

My boyfriend Noah wasn’t completely against sharing food, but at times he did glare at me when I liberally plucked some chicken nuggets from his plate.

From these few observations (and a few others I can’t tangibly describe because they are such vague memories) it has gotten me to wondering if there is a hidden social standard that women share food and men don’t. I honestly have no idea, but it’s good brain gum for you all to chew on.

Day 27

Today I went out with some girls to get manicures. I decided since there were only 3 days left I’d get my acrylics removed and my nails painted red. I had no idea what I was getting myself into!

Now this blog isn’t a business review site, but I have to say the service there was terrible! The woman who did my nails seemed to have no idea what she was doing, I just asked her the prices and she stooped her head down and just said “umm…” and that I guess was her answer. Now I understand that some people are shy but you’re getting paid by me to get this done so don’t put me in an awkward situation!

I had to dip my fingers in nail polish remover for the next 20 minutes. for those of you who have never encountered nail polish remover; it feels and smells very similarly to rubbing alcohol. My hands felt like they had been walking in the middle of the desert with no water for a few hours.

my “fingers dipped in rubbing alcohol” smile

She very gradually shaved off the excess acrylic and painted my nails. Usually they give you a little light chamber you put your hands under for about 5-10 minutes to get them to dry but she was finished as soon as the painting was done. Somehow I was expected to get up, grab my purse, reach in and grab my wallet, pay, then open the door, walk to the car, open the car door, start the car, and drive without even touching my nails.

Feels just as pleasant as it looks!

This was probably the most stress I’ve been through in a while. And of course, I didn’t leave unscathed at all. I like the color though! I just wish it were shiny instead of scratched and pockmarked.

Now that my nails were back I was excited to put them to good use. I then realized why acrylics were so addictive; my nails were weak and brittle! Before I couldn’t even itch myself properly but now I didn’t even feel comfortable itching myself for fear that my nails would fold over on themselves!

My nails were once strong and independent, now they’re fragile and needy! I can’t wait for them to grow back!

Poor little guys!

I also watched 2 more chick flicks: “Valentines Day” and “Because I Said So”.

Noah and I decided to watch “Valentines Day” not on Valentine’s Day because everyone else would be watching it then and we didn’t care enough to fight for tickets. I was a little worried because I saw on Cosmopolitan.com that it was an absolutely atrocious film. I thought to myself if a woman at the girliest magazine at all time hated the movie then why in the hell should I like it?

I was at an advanced stage of chick-flickitus though so I ignored the review. The movie was predictable as stated in the review, but it wasn’t terrible. These flicks have definitely begun to wear at my proud resolve; for the first time I can recall I said “awwwww” in a movie, and meant it!

This makes me really disappointed in whoever reviewed the movie in Cosmo. I mean, they should know by now that most women readers would not be so picky in their films, and when does a magazine for women trash on films for women? Cosmopolitan isn’t exactly known for their intellectual articles or deep questions of what is right or wrong. It just doesn’t seem right.

I also watched “Because I Said So”, and I realized I had peaked my chick flick fever. My reactions to every comedic moment were fully expressed by loud squeals and huge grins.

Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day, so I hope you all enjoy it, I know I will!

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Day 25: Looks

Posted on February 11, 2010. Filed under: Girly Girl, Week 4 | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

Today I woke up at 7. It was a pretty average morning; I’ll spare the mundane details.


As I said before, this is the skankiest outfit I’ve worn this whole month, and so I decided to take on a skankier persona as well (kind of).

I realized while being glanced at by another man that I SUCK at the “come hither” or “eye sex” look. Maybe this is the reason all my friends get hit on and I don’t? Whenever a guy, or rather anyone looks my way I usually look away immediately then look back and attempt a friendly smile realizing I must seem like a snob.

It’s always incredibly awkward for me to walk past people, especially acquaintances. When it comes to nonverbal flirtation from across the room, which I sometimes try to do for the sake of trying, it always ends up me looking at the guy really blankly then looking past him.

I told Noah this and we tried eye sex looks back and forth. I either broke down laughing or just generally looked like an ass. Still, my new found confidence did seem to somehow gain me some new guy friends. It was either my exposed cleavage or my more desperate and less awkward approach.

Either way, while I may not have mastered this sexy stare, I still consider today a success. Now hopefully I didn’t get any stalkers from it!

I realized from this that it’s ok to open up to other men. I don’t need to constantly be on guard like every guy around me is a potential rapist out to get me. I think this girly naiveté I maintain gains me friends without alienating others. I also don’t have to avoid the subject of having a boyfriend around guys so as not to “upset” them as I used to.

From being girly I’ve learned that being open to as many people as possible is a great idea, and if they can’t deal with the fact that I’m not going to get as cozy as they’d like, well it sure as hell isn’t, and shouldn’t be my problem.

Of course, this has been only one day of getting attention. I tend to get annoyed at too much attention from too many people. I hate it when too many people start wanting things from me (like time to hang out), it gets overwhelming. I think that’s why I’ve never had many friends. I hate that about me, it’s such an inefficient way to get by. Having lots of friends can get you places, plus there are a lot of people there to back you up when you’re on the ground.

If anyone has advice on not only how to make friends but KEEP them let me know. I’m pretty sure the answer will require me to pick up the phone and call old friends but I’m hoping it’s something else. I think that’s what really keeps me from having friends; I HATE calling people! I am terrified of it! I’m terrified of calling someone and hearing “Hey, thanks for FINALLY calling me (asshole)!” and looking like a jerk.

Maybe that’s another reason I prefer hanging out with guys; they don’t expect you to call them, ever! But I’m not a man, and I need to finally accept that fact and be a girl. Time to make some calls (tomorrow, no, next week)!

{not pictured}: same outfit for tomorrow as day 2’s

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Day 24: Slumped

Posted on February 10, 2010. Filed under: Girly Girl, Week 4 | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

Today I woke up at 7:49(late!!)! I rushed to put on makeup and somehow got to school on time but it was incredibly stressful.

I think this set the tone for the whole day because throughout it I felt really unhappy. I think this experiment is really wearing on me.

I think I failed at getting a supportive circle of girlfriends and it’s hard to want to keep up with this without the feeling of belonging to something.

Maybe I’m just disappointed in myself for not going as far as I could have with this. I know that I had limitations but I’ll never be able to replicate this again without already knowing what’s in store for me.

I read an article in Glamour called “What his Valentine Gift says About your Relationship” it was funny how ridiculous and judgmental it was. You would think that girls would understand by now that guys don’t leave subliminal messages hidden around their actions, girls do that! I mean, if a guy got her something really weird like knives it’s an obvious sign but roses and/or a box of chocolates doesn’t mean anything.


By the way, this is the skankiest outfit I’ll be wearing for the month (hopefully), so stay tuned!

I think I just need to take these last few days as seriously as I can. I feel like I’ve been slacking, and the slacking is putting a slump in my shoulders. I did this to learn, not to complain. Tomorrow is going to be a whole new day!

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Day 23: Pretty

Posted on February 9, 2010. Filed under: Girly Girl, Week 4 | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

Today I woke up at 6:50. It was a rushed morning, and I was incredibly unsure about my makeup. I decided on a bronzey brown color but was very insecure about it the whole day. I really want some better eyeshadow applicators though I’m impressed with what I’ve been able to do with the crap that I’ve got now.


Today was the first day I used a waist belt. this was really exciting because it was my secret guilty girly fetish before this whole experiment. Most feminist-minded people would expect me to realize my mistake and complain about how it constricted my breathing and wasn’t worth it. It was! It’s an instant confidence booster. I can eat as much as I want and not feel self conscious. It was like a little fairy godmother saying “eat up, I got you covered.”

When I took it off at the end of the day I felt my gut spill out. Instead of feeling relieved, I felt exposed. All of a sudden I realized my perfect little waist was just an illusion, that I did eat out at Azteca today, and that it did show.

Also, men seemed to love it! I got a lot of compliments, especially from my boyfriend.

As the month begins to end, school is really winding up, and I’ve realized how hasty I’ve been with starting this experiment. I had no idea how much time and effort it would take to keep it up and how little I feel I’ve accomplished compared to what I know I could have if I had done more research and had more time.

My shoe injures are healing!

This being said, I’ve decided to not adopt another personality until after the quarter ends. I want to really get the full experience of each person I’m becoming and mostly what I’ve gotten out of being girly are the clothes, which is just the tip of the iceberg for the personality. I feel like I’ve really let myself and other down with my hastiness, and next time around, things will really be well planned.

I also realized I need to know more cultural stuff in order to have more informed blog entries. I want to really take this seriously, but I’m just worried I don’t have the means/knowledge/friends to make this go as far as it could go.

I’ve discovered that Glamour.com is much better that Cosmopolitan.com and had an awesome article about how girls need to dress down for men to show they’re not as high maintenance as the actually are. It’s good to know that men are smart enough to pick up on those cues, though I’m sure lots of guys are completely oblivious. If you are a guy and have no idea what I’m talking about, check out this article.

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Day 22: Makeup

Posted on February 8, 2010. Filed under: Girly Girl, Week 4 | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

I woke up at 6:45 this morning! I’m really proud of myself because not only did I wake up easily but I could have woken up earlier than that! This is a big deal because there are many times the alarm goes off at 6 and we press the snooze button despite the fact that I could get up then when we wake up 30 minutes later I am so tired I want to die just so I can sleep longer.

Ahh! looking good sure feels good!

Also, I finally had the time to thoroughly do my makeup and hair. It seemed like forever, and it definitely lightened my mood quite a bit! Also, I just HAVE to brag; but I got that adorable shirt at Goodwill! Being stylish and thrifty is the ultimate win!

Other than my looking AMAZING all day, nothing much happened. It was a typical hellish Monday; busy from 9am till 9 pm. 12 hour days at school are great!

I have to say this whole makeup business can be really fun! My boyfriend could even agree. This morning was daunting because my outfit required a very specific color scheme: Green, black, and white. I had no idea what to make my eyeshadow. I heard from someone that you’re not supposed to match eyeshadows with outfits but from everyone else I’ve received compliments for perfect color coordination.

I was so conflicted I even resorted to Yahoo answers to find my solution. I was told that whatever color is least common on my outfit should be on my eyes and by other sources that a little bit of green with black liner and mascara would work.

So I did the green. It looked amazing! Then my wonderfully genius boyfriend suggested I put some silver on the top lid; I taught him well! So, I ended up putting dark green on the eyelid, lighter green above it, and silver above that. I was feeling a little saucy so I added some darker silver to the under-eye a little. I also added a very very light green/blue to the insides of my eyes. It looked fantastic!

Of course the picture makes it look average

Pretty much that was my day; obsessing over my looks. The rest was doing homework running between classes and going to a meeting.

But I realized I’m channeling my old high school self a lot through this project in more ways than girly. I’ve been having a lot of trouble concentrating in class and have a deep desire to write and/or doodle. These were things I did a lot in high school, but somehow abandoned in college. But I’m also getting incredibly insecure, and not only about my appearance. I feel awkward like I lack social skills all of a sudden.

I don’t know how much of this is related to who I interacted with today at school or if it has something to do with me trying to get in touch with my girly side by bringing back the me that was as close to girly as I ever was.

I don’t like this though, it’s not right. This project is meant for me to discover a new self, not an old, obsolete one.

When I finally got home at 9 and got to take off all my clothes I was in for a surprise:


Saggy ears.

Level 4 pain tolerance earrings

I had definitely worked my way up to this amount of weight. remember days 1-3 where I was constantly in pain? If I had worn these guys on those days my ears would be bleeding. Now I can see why women have a higher pain tolerance than men because I was only mildly annoyed by the weight of these all day.

Something that is kind of scaring me is the necklace I wore today. It always leaves a weird grey mark and I suspect at times that it could be causing reactions. Maybe I just need to clean it:

Noah has gotten genuinely annoyed by how long I take to coordinate a new outfit. He thinks I’m way too critical and I should just settle. He has no idea what kind of pressure I’m under (in my head) to look amazing every day.

I have expectations to keep. People have been so impressed so far by my capabilities and I hate disappointing! I have to make sure that every outfit fits the part as much as I can or I have failed at the cardinal rule of girlyness.

Actually, now that I think of it, what is the cardinal rule of girlyness? I need to do some research.

First time utilizing a waist belt, wish me luck!

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