Day 27 and 28: Sad
The past two days have somehow been devoid of any possible New age activities. I’ve got nothing to do but cook or meditate. I decided to read some more Eckhart Tolle to figure things out better. It definitely brought me a lot of solace to read the book. My depression seems to have worsened with the lack of things to do. The days feel as if they are melting together, like there isn’t a distinction between one day or the other.
Reading Eckhart Tolle’s book helped a lot; it talked about tackling feelings of sadness by acknowledging them and not wallowing in them. It made me realize this was a fleeting feeling (hopefully) and that I would somehow push past it, I would eventually feel better.
I decided to spend my time cooking and staying at home instead of going to school events. I spent all day at home and made some raw recipes.
First I made raw “Phad Thai” with tahini. It would have been really tasty if the recipe didn’t ask me to put so much cayenne pepper in it. It was way too spicy! My mom liked it though, I did like how it was so fresh, and that’s my favorite thing about vegetables. I’m not going to put up a recipe I don’t really believe in on my blog, but here’s the
link to it if you want to try it out.
Another recipe I tried out was raw chocolate cake. First I had chocolate ganache which required a recipe of its own.
Honestly, the cake was AMAZING! It was rich, chocolately, and dense. It was way easier to make than normal cake, and I honestly don’t even like typical cake! Everything about this was absolutely delectable, and it was much healthier too! I bet this is the HEALTHIEST CAKE EVER without compromising any of its tastiness! If anyone is willing to refute my claim then please email me the recipe to a better, healthier cake.
This cloud over my head may be temporary, but it is making me realize how debilitating depression has the potential to be. I don’t have much motivation to do anything and I’m beginning to sleep more and more often. I just want to lay in bed all day and stay away from any possible stressors or stimuli. Perhaps that’s what I need right now, perhaps I just need to relax and do nothing. Maybe I’m not being so terrible after all, I’m just following my mental, physical, and spiritual needs. I’ll stick with that so I can try to feel better about myself, in the meantime, sorry for not finishing this month the way it should have been finished!