Day 5: Inner Peace
This morning I tried a new yoga video. It was called “Yoga for inflexible people” and my mom had picked it up straight from our local library. It was honestly a really bad video. I have short hamstrings so I can’t do too many stretches when it comes to splits and touching. Still, this video that supposedly caters to me had my touch my toes. I don’t really think you care to hear the flaws of a yoga video you most likely will never come in contact with, so I’ll move on.
Revolution my ass
For breakfast I had a dish called “kicharee” it was part of an Aryuvedic diet my mom got me to do for medical reasons. The diet was supposed to help me with a skin condition, it greatly limited my diet, and was full of contradictions (and I hate being told to follow two contradictions) I usually love this dish but it just felt too soupy for me today, I was craving something solid and hardy. I have kind of a problem with soup; I can only have so much before I can’t stand it.
But it’s really healthy and tasty
I thought being vegan would be really easy after having had the Ayurvedic diet, but today at school I felt incredibly tempted to just go buy a sandwich or a cookie at the espresso stand. I had always heard complaints about how limited the food provisions were at this stand, and I had always wondered why because it provided organic sandwiches. I never really checked to see if there was a vegan option. There were some vegetarian options, but they had animal products in them.
Being vegan is harder than I thought. While there is a variety of food that doesn’t require animal products its not the kind of food you can find typically in general places like cafes and convenience stores. I have to bring all my food I’ll eat throughout the school day from home, and if I don’t have enough, then I’ll just have to go hungry until I go home.
Today I made a lot of progress. I read a book called “Transform your life, A Blissful Journey”. It’s written by a Buddhist monk from Tibet and it has already transformed my life.
“happiness and suffering are states of mind, and so their main causes cannot be found outside of the mind, the real source of happiness is inner peace.” It really resounded with me. I felt a huge weight off my back knowing that others could not bring down my happiness and cause negativity. Throughout the day when annoyances occurred it was as if my anger and myself were two separate entities.
I could tell when things might have made me upset, but instead of actually feeling upset it just felt like an acknowledgment.
I feel that anger and negativity are needed in life. This experiment is meant to prove that every type of person has something about them that makes them functional, that’s beneficial. Positivity, happiness are such treasured goals in life, but sadness and negativity in general are considered infections.
It’s understandable, but I think negativity must have benefits, or else why would it exist? Perhaps our anger, immorality, selfishness, and sadness are meant to push us to work hard to better ourselves, but should we banish all negativity?
The goal in this book was for us to reach “nirvana”, a state of permanent happiness and inner peace.Perhaps I’m being narrow minded, but I don’t want to transform myself so much that I have no negativity. Not to say that negativity is vital to my life but I feel that my ups and downs make me a smarter, more interesting, and happier person. Perhaps its the fact that I abhor complete stability as it doesn’t allow for personal growth, but perhaps nirvana is the pinnacle of personal growth and I’m not allowing myself to understand it.
My life is amazing and I’m so glad to be alive and have the friends and family that I have. I’m looking forward to being filled with even more happiness and inner peace than I already have.
Anyway, this book has already changed my life. But unfortunately I can’t say I can agree with the rest of it. Some of the terminology is too abstract, and while I would like to simply “believe” I can’t just accept every theory unless I can personally relate to it.
I will continue to read it though, as it has already made my life more peaceful. I think I’ll also print out a that mantra and keep it with me to remember.
Later today, I came home and made some vegan cookies! The recipe came from a book called “Vegan Cookies”. I was initially very skeptical as I’ve tried vegan pastries before and they are usually very hard, stiff, and dry since there’s no butter or eggs to make them delicious. I cooked with Noah, and we were scared that the cookies would be too hard, so I decided to add a tablespoon of coconut oil to them.
Coconut oil is the best butter imitation I know of. It gets hard when it’s colder and turns to liquid when its warmer. Its sweeter tasting than butter too, and goes splendidly with any sweet things (especially banana!!). It was scary at first because the cookies were supposed to be firm after being baked for 10-12 minutes, but long after that they were still very soft.
I finally gave up and took them out. They were solid enough when they cooled. They were also amazingly delicious. I’m going to call them “happy cookies” from now on and save the recipe they’re so good! They’re packed with chocolate and are moist and chewy, whenever I’m feeling down I’m going to grab one of these and I expect to feel better by the time I’m done!
Don’t they just put a smile on your face?
Also, I think every vegan should have a sweet recipe for indulging in their sweet tooth. It’s a crime to only live off non-sweet, non-sugary, non-melt-in-your-mouthey foods. It’s therapeutic to have some sweets in your life!
You know what’s awesome about making vegan cookies? The dough! You can eat it without worrying about getting salmonella! Though…I usually would eat it anyway…
The night wound down pretty early, but before I went to bed my mom let me borrow a medicine bag necklace!! I was so grateful, but I have no idea what to put in it. I decided to put my healing stones in it for now and ask someone who knew how to use one later. And that’s exactly what I plan to do.
I wished I had done a little more today, it felt that in practice today was somewhat of a waste, but despite that I felt like I had a good day, that I’d learned how to embrace my spirituality and gained inner peace. I look forward to learning more.